Friday, July 25, 2008

apology accepted or not

i recently saw an apology issued to some friends of mine by somebody that was seemingly long gone from their past. this person used, lied to and hurt many people. when somebody issues an apology, what should be done with it?

the mature and wonderfully ideal thing to do is accept it and move on and not let hurt feelings remain hurt. however in the real world where i live, i'm not so quick to let bygones be bygones. i guess i accept apologies but i am not so quick to simply forgive and forget.

i was apologized to recently. but it's for something that has happened many times. many times i have been apologized to. i accept these apologies and believe that hurting my feelings was never the intention. however, i WAS hurt. i have a problem getting passed this.

i don't think i am asking too much by wanting time after an apology to mull it over and allow my heart to heal. in any situation, it seems wrong and presumptuous of the apology maker to expect that just because they say the words "i am sorry" that they should be given a clean slate.

to be truely sorry and apologetic for a wrongdoing, whether intentional or not, one should be willing to accept that they may in fact not be forgiven. that's part of life. you just have to build a bridge and get your ass over it.

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